In follow-up to yesterday's excellent post on tackling fear by Prof. Pritchard, I…unfortunately…spent most of my three years in law school in fear. In fact, I felt like I was the only one that was without roots, without a sense of presence, without wholeness in law school. But, since then, I now know the truth…many of us as law students feel alone and in fear.
Apparently, there is something called the 10/5 rule that might have helped me. The 10/5 rule is used throughout the hotel and hospitality industries to help strangers feel welcome. And, because many law students feel as though they are strangers throughout law school, I wonder whether the 10/5 rule might help law students overcome fear and loneliness to become instead empowered as partners with others in a community of learners.
So, here's the nut and bolts of the 10/5 rule:
It starts when you are ten feet away from another person. Just make eye contact with a friendly smile. That's it.
Then, when you are five feet away, just add a friendly "hello" with perhaps a quick expression like "Wow; that's a big casebook you're carrying."
You see, according to freelance writer Jennifer Wallace: "Chitchat is an important social lubricant, helping to build empathy and a sense of community." http://www.wsj.com/articles/the-benefits-of-a-little-small-talk-1475249737 Often, though, we underestimate the importance of small talk.
According to a 2014 study, Professor Nicholas Epley and Ph.D. student Juliana Schroeder conducted experiments on commuter trains in Chicago in which participants were grouped into three cohorts: some were told to engage in polite conversations with strangers, some were told to avoid conversations with strangers, and some (as a control group) were asked to engage in conversations as they normally do. Interestingly, the rule-breakers – those in the group that actually broke the "social rules of the commuter" by engaging in small talk with strangers – reported significantly more positive experiences and no less productive time as they commuted. http://faculty.chicagobooth.edu/nicholas.epley/EpleySchroeder2014.pdf
In another study conducted on a campus setting of 40,000 students, researchers evaluated whether an eye gaze and a friendly smile might make any difference with respect to students' sense of belonging. In the experiment, the authors had a research experimenter randomly walk past college students in which she either avoided eye contact, engaged in eye contact, or engaged in eye contact accompanied by a friendly smile. Trailing the experimenter was a research associate who then surveyed each passerby. Without tipping the students about the experiment, the research associate asked each student to evaluate their sense of belonging. Surprisingly, even when students were not aware of the research experimenter's contact with them, students who were greeted with an eye gaze reported a greater sense of belonging (with the highest reported benefit by those greeted with both an eye gaze and a smile). As the authors indicate, "simple eye contact is sufficient to convey inclusion. In contrast, withholding eye contact can signal exclusion." http://pss.sagepub.com/content/23/2/166
These results seem to validate the 10/5 rule. So, why not put to practice the 10/5 rule in law school. Looking back, I wonder whether, if I had practiced the 10/5 rule as a law student, I would have developed connections with others in law school (and put fear and loneliness aside). Perhaps I just need to start greeting others with an eye gaze and a brief "howdy." In light of this research, our small interactions with our students might be the bridge to help our students not just survive in law school but thrive. So, here's to "breaking the rules" and smiling with you! (Scott Johns).
