By the end of September, academic success and bar professionals feel the bandwidth belt tighten. To protect your workflow, productivity, and sanity, now is the time to practice William Ury’s “Power of Positive No.”[1] While this book is frequently used in ADR courses, the method for delivering a “no” is transferrable to our daily work life.
We are at the time of year when our students “need a minute”, meeting conflicts overtake our calendar, and weekly assessment feedback elongates the workday until late evenings. As William Ury explains, “at the heart of the difficulty in saying ‘no’ is the tension between exercising your power and tending to your relationship.”[2] In the context of our profession, the tension arises between tending to our professional well-being and supporting relationships within the workplace.
Ury’s book does an excellent job explaining how to execute the “Yes! No. Yes?” approach in three specific stages – preparation, delivery, and follow through.[3] With emphasis on the delivery stage, when it is time to say no, express your “yes” (your motivations for saying no), assert your “no” (consistently and persistently), and propose an alternative “yes” (which creates opportunity for mutual gains).[4]
To illustrate this tactic through a common workplace hypothetical: a student organization contacts you to create an academic workshop by next week. You are on a very busy faculty committee, teaching two courses, and providing individual weekly feedback on sixty assignments. You feel the tension between managing your limited time versus supporting students and establishing positive rapport. Delivering a flat “no” response will lead to student disappointment and harm relationships. Instead of a simple “no”, explain your motives to say “no” (you have pressing committee obligations requiring more time than you anticipated), deliver your “no” (“I’m unable to offer a workshop next week”), and propose an alternative (“Perhaps we can recruit some student success mentors to host a panel or workshop in lieu of my participation?”). This approach opens the door for opportunities while also maintaining your professional well-being.
Thus, in finishing September’s communication series, don’t forget to empower your “no.” (and read William Ury’s books – it is worth it for professional development).
(Amy Vaughan-Thomas)
[1] WILLIAM URY, THE POWER OF A POSITIVE NO: HOW TO SAY NO AND STILL GET TO YES 50 (Bantam Books 2007)
[2] Id. at 22
[3] Id. at 40
[4] Id.
